Home, Home On the Range...: August 2009

Hayden and his new Indian best friend

I have a son who loves to make new friends.

It's beautiful, actually.

He's sweet, tender, sensitive and fascinated by becoming best pals with whoever he meets. It forces me to come out of my naturally shy and guarded shell when he strikes up random conversations with the nearest soul.

Disneyland was no different.

Never in his life had he ever been surrounded by so many fresh potential friends.

And despite our frequent (frank and serious) conversations about "strangers" I found myself constantly listening to his amazing ability to mingle (especially with fellow victims of the dreaded wait in line). The spaces were tight and most people spent their energy just trying not to bump into the person next to them or stare too much at anyone in particular. Not MY son, though. For example:

(Actual Conversation)

Hayden: So! Have you been on this ride before?

Me: (Here we go again!)

Soon-to-be-pal: Yes I have (a little shocked that someone was engaging them in conversation).

Hayden: Well, is it fast or slow?

Soon-to-be-pal: It's slow.

Hayden: (Laying-on the timid voice) I'm a little bit nervous because I've never been on this ride before. What's it like?

Soon-to-be-pal: Oh don't worry! (relaxed and sympathetic) You'll be okay....the ride is like....

And VOILA! The (initially) reluctant stranger is now smiling, enthusiastically giving my 6-year-old a pep-talk and cheering him on. Soon, others start to chime in and it becomes a group interaction. The encounters usually last throughout the wait in line and end with a thumbs-up or a high-five (initiated by my social butterfly). Before you know it, everyone is smiling and chuckling. I just smile and nod and make sure we don't trip while stepping into the tiny flying elephant.

Watching my son effortlessly do something that is so difficult for me is humbling. He has a gift.

It was during a long wait for "It's a Small World" that I was especially touched. You know the ride: The boat voyage that takes you across all the continents around the world while you watch dolls singing and dancing and celebrating the idea that (at the end of the day) we are all just people; that despite our different cultures and languages we can come together as brothers and sisters and love each other. I went on it for the first time when I was four years old. I still remember it and let me tell you I was MESMERIZED! Granted, as a child hundreds of animatronic dolls seem magical, while as an adult they seem just a teensy bit creepy...BUT I can appreciate the message.

Of course, there was a line. So of course, my son scoped-out his next best friend.

He found him: A little boy (just 5 years old) who's family immigrated to the US from India 10 years ago. He was shy, but Hayden soon broke down the walls and they were buddies. While tending to Ella in the sling and keeping her happy enough to slowly drift off to dreamland, I didn't really pay much attention to the conversations until we were almost boarding the boat. "Hey, maybe we can ride together!" I heard Hayden organize the seating arrangement and before I knew it, Hayden was sitting in the front row with his new best friend while I sat in the second row with his mother.

We chatted throughout the entire trip. We talked about different cultures and countries, about immigrating to the Melting Pot and still teaching children about their ancestral heritage. She asked me about serving a mission in the culturally-diverse Montreal. Her name was Nuni and she explained how all her children are bi-lingual since she refuses to speak English in the home and refuses to speak anything BUT English outside the home. I asked her about her experiences of coming to the "Land of the Free" and she lovingly pointed out the Indian dolls (to the boys) dancing and swaying their heads side-to-side. She expressed her love of this ride, her eyes sparkling as she explained how overwhelmed she was the first time she saw it.

And in an instant we were back outside in the light of the setting sun.

The ride was over.

As we stepped out of the boat we joyfully said our good-byes and went our separate ways, smiling.

We never saw them again.

The next day I had to explain to Hayden that we couldn't go play at their house because we didn't know where they were.

"We were just there at the same place at the same time. We crossed paths for a half-hour and now we are miles and miles apart." I did the best I could to explain, but I found myself tripping over my own tongue, unable to adequately explain to him the importance of that beautiful experience.

After a moment of contemplative silence he stated, "I liked my new friend."

Then, I thought about the words to the song and realized that I never thought a ride at Disneyland could make me want to cry.

* * *

There is just one moon and one golden sun

And a smile means friendship to everyone.

Though the mountains divide

And the oceans are wide

It's a small world after all!

It's a world of laughter, a world of tears

It's a world of hopes, it's a world of fears

There's so much that we share

That is why we're aware

It's a small small world.

Hippie Ella: Chilling in the shuttle while entering Disneyland

Dear Hayden and Ella (in the future);

In case it ever comes up in therapy, I'm going to apologize now for not taking ANY pictures during your first visit to Disneyland.

But let's face it, we were too busy having fun and riding rides, weren't we? Especially when the three of us diehards stayed in Fantasy Land for over four hours while everyone else went back to the hotel for a nap. Carrying Ella in the sling and pushing Hayden around in the baby stroller, we were just too preoccupied scoping out Small World to even THINK about busting out the camera and finding just the right angle. Besides, I had run out of hands and arms. I hope this supports the fact that I love you more than my camera.

I would also like to apologize for taking you on three of the scariest rides first. You see, it was empty at 8am and Pirates of the Carribean doesn't even OFFER the fast pass. We had to go on that (and Splash Mountain and the Haunted Mansion) first. Sorry that it freaked you out and made you wonder for a moment if we had brought you to Hell for our family trip. I hope I made it up to you. (I think the fact that you later told me Pirates was your favorite ride was a good sign.)

I would like to remind you, though, Hayden, that I did in fact give up my fast pass TWICE for you so that you could take my turn and ride Star Tours over and over again. You're Welcome!

At least I pulled it together enough to take Before and After pictures of you both. I think these photos speak for themselves.

Love,

Mom

BEFORE:

(Buying Tickets at 7am)