Jan 31st 2010 Watching the sunset over the Dragoon Mountains
(...and me with NO make-up. awesome.)
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Okay, with all these long-lost-friends we are finding on facebook, many are asking for more stories and clarification about Ben's notorious stroke. I'll finally do a better job of "spilling-it" on the blog now, as promised last year.
*NOTE: The following is part of an on-going series of "Stroke Posts".
For an introduction to "Stroke Posts" click HERE. For relative stories, click HERE.
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There was a time....
Before babies...
Before joint checking accounts...
Before the Honeymoon even BEGAN...
...When we were slapped in the face with a reality check.
I was a 24-year old Esthetics instructor,
Ben was a 28-year old Fire Science and Emergency Response student with one semester left until graduation.
We were married in January and decided to delay our Honeymoon until AFTER the Olympics were over, since our days back then were filled with work, Olympics, skating rehersals, more work, applying for work at various Fire Departments....aaaaand Olympics (did I already mention that?).
Ben enthusiastically asked me where I wanted to go for our first trip together.
I told him, "Surprise Me! No, really; Don't even tell me until we're getting on the plane."
That was the deal.
* * *
I called Ben during a break from my afternoon lecture on Langerhans Cells and the stratum spinosum layer of the epidermis.
It was two months after we were married in Vegas....
One week after the Olympics ended...
It was wednesday...
...and 2:15 in the afternoon.
During our chat, I heard a faint, "whoa" as Ben bent over to tie his shoes.
I almost changed the subject of the conversation.
I almost moved-on to telling him about my day,
but somehow a red flag sprang up in my thoughts and I had to pause.
"Are you okay?"
"Ya, I just bent over and I got a little dizzy. (pause) Hmm. My foot feels weird."
"What do you mean weird?"
"Oh, it's no big deal. I've been working out a lot lately and lifting quite a bit. I'm probably tired. I'm going to go walk out to the mailbox, so I'll talk to you later."
...and that was the end of it...
until about an hour later when there was another call for me....
"Do you know the name of a Chiropractor?"
"No. I've never been to one."
"Why don't you ask around for me? I think I have a pinched nerve. My foot isn't working very well now and it feels like I need to be adjusted or something."
"Sure, I'll ask around."
(But I never did.)
Ben tried to lay down on the livingroom floor of our little townhouse; hoping that the "pinched nerve" would find relief, but as he tried to sit up again, he couldn't. In fact, the entire left side of his body didn't work now. Pulling himself across the floor with his right arm, pushing with his right leg, and straining to lift himself up onto the couch he realized that he wasn't dealing with a pinched nerve.
First he called me.
It was 5pm and I was leaving work.
"Will you stop at Taco Bell on your way home and grab me a few tacos?"
...and of course, being the dutiful little wifey I did just that, eventhough there was a voice of concern in the back of my mind...
(I know better now.)
By the time I walked through the door, bag o' tacos in hand, I found Ben laying on the couch. He greeted me with a big smile, his (right) hand waving high in the air, and a cheerful, "Hi Sweetie!" I still remember the look on his face: He looked happy and calm for the most part, but there was a look. I'm not the clueless newlywed today that I was back then. NOW I know that he was scared.
I told him to call 9-1-1 (since he already had the phone) while I ran through the house, methodically packing a backpack for the hospital. You know, JUST IN CASE he had to spend the night.
I had no idea.
He ended up staying in the hospital for 4 months (including inpatient rehab).
About two weeks after the ambulance came and swept Ben away to the Emergency Room, I was sitting in the office and checking email one afternoon before traveling back to the hospital.
The phone rang.
"Hello, this is Michelle with Princess Cruises! I'm just calling to confirm your cruise to the Caribbean for April.....(blah, blah, blah)."
I don't remember what she said after that (because all I heard was "Caribbean" and "Cruise"). I thought about WALKING around sunny sandy beaches with my new husband. I thought about seeing the ocean from the deck of a gigantic gleaming white ship. I finally woke up again when there was a long moment of silence on the phone.
"I don't think we're going to be able to keep that reservation," I started. "Something has come up...."