"Open La Boca, Insert Los Pies!"

We go to the border to shop sometimes.

We USUALLY stay on the US side because that's where Super Wal-Mart is.

(If you ever want to be reminded of how blessed we are then just cross over to Mexico for a few minutes and when you come back, the border town suddenly looks mighty clean and upscale.)

Really.

There are a few things you can count on when shopping on the border:

1.) Most of the license plates will be from Mexico,

2.) You will know what it feels like to be a minority,

3.) Border Patrol will be parked outside and waiting for illegal border-crossers to come out of the trees and into the parking lot, and,

4.) Somebody will be walking around outside selling tamales in a freezer bag.

During our trip today we brought Ella, Hayden and Mia with us.  Before we opened the doors to get out, I suddenly thought of a potential "issue" and decided to address it with our young guests.  For some reason five-year olds have a fascination with foreign languages and I've noticed that THESE little ones are no exception.

"We are 20 yards away from Mexico," I started, "which means many people here today are going to be speaking Spanish."

"I know how to speak Spanish," piped Mia.  "I can say Hola!"

"I know how to speak Janapese (Japanese)," countered Hayden.  "I saw it on TV."

"That's great,"  I continued.  "Today, however we are NOT going to be speaking other languages, we are only going to be speaking English."  Then, I remembered my desire to be (and to help my family be) tri-lingual, so I smoothly followed that statement with, "Well, you can practice saying the words you KNOW in Spanish to people."  Just then I looked at Ben in the driver's seat and he flashed me a sudden look of panic.  "NEVERMIND!  Maybe we can practice a little at home before we use our Spanish in public."  Everyone seemed good with that.  (Whew;  That was when I gave myself an imaginary pat on the back for such an awesome recovery.)  "Okay, we are not going to pretend we speak any OTHER languages either, because unless we really DO speak that language we are being rude.  Does everyone understand?"

Everyone nodded in agreement.

My effort to avoid an embarrassing moment was in vain, however because I didn't notice the Bi-Lingual family standing outside as I started to open the car door, still pointing my head to the backseat and loudly proclaiming, "We are still in America, so we only speak English here."

(Ooops.)

And by the way (can I vent?):

I'm just a teensy bit irritated at the ONE lady who allegedly came through town yesterday and cleaned EVERY shelf of every store in Douglas out of Hand Sanitizer (from the gigantic bucket refills to the travel-size tubes).  Trust me: I checked!  If I get this Pig Flu coming from Mexico it's going to be because of HER!

My new motto this week will be "HOARDING SHOULD BE A CRIME!"

*Photo: www.worthpoint.com

(...since I didn't feel good about taking a picture of someone's plates in the parking lot and then plastering it on the internet.  THIS one was ALREADY plastered on the net.)